Why you always need to come first!

When I was a teacher I always used to ask my students "Who is the most important person in your life?" some of them would take a while and might still come back with "my mum" or "shane". Why did I ask them this? because I wanted them to reflect and really think who is the most important. The answer should always be me.

When you become a mum, a partner, a wife, a business owner it is even more important that you prioritise you. It is one of the biggest cliches out there but a happy mummy means happier children (remember they are also their own people so I am not telling you by being happy your kids will be perfect!). 

In our increasingly busy lives where sometimes it can feel we are juggling more and more balls every week the need to take some time for yourself is even more pressing. Fundamentally, if you don't prioritise yourself other things are going to be affected. I have seen so many of my friends and family forget about this and this is when you are likely to suffer burnout or worse.

I have always been the type of person to through myself into things at 100 miles an hour and luckily my partner is very aware of this and gets me to slow down and take stock. I now make sure that I have some time every day to focus on me - this can be as simple as having a bath, reading a magazine (a book is too ambitious at the moment but we will get there), meditating, exercising (both my kids love me doing the body coach or other videos and even join in) or chatting on my phone to a friend. By having this time I am able to be a better mum, better partner and better business owner. 

As well as the daily time I also look for time during the week when I can go out and do something for me. Again, these aren't massive chunks of time I am talking about and it ranges from getting my nails done (I love having great nails - it has always been a bit of a "thing" of mine), going to a yoga class to meeting up with a friend for a drink. All of these activities help me feel like me and don't have anything to do with my business or my kids. 

Life can be very stressful especially as we are spinning an increasing number of plates, working for yourself (or indeed most jobs) can mean that you feel that you need to be permanently on - keeping up your social media presence, replying to emails as well as making your kids freshly cooked food and thinking of new and fun games you can play with them. Don't let yourself be lost in all of this, eek out time for you and the positive effects it has on your mental health and happiness will impact the rest of your life too.

Ruth xx

Ruth Kudzimotherhood